Today was a hard day at work. I almost got an anxiety attack because of my own paranoia and worry.

And then I realise why did I even feel that way? I had no need to. I remembered that earlier this year, we had been through worse. And we got through it. This was nothing. Nothing compared.

And so I took a breath and I thanked Allah for reminding me. To stop picking on the little details. Take a step back. Breathe. Everything that happened, happened for a reason. What we went through with Little H, the ups and downs, they changed something in us. What we gained from it, even as we lost our son, was to persevere and forge through. To be resilient. To not take things too seriously. To not be so hard-up on the unnecessary nitty gritty.

I will remember my son when I feel I am at my lowest. Because at the time when I thought I would be, then, I was at my strongest. And if I could be strong in such a difficult situation, then I can be strong in any situation.

I love you son.

So much.

And I miss you, every day.

But I am also always thankful, everyday, for the brief moments I had with you. For the precious few moments you gave us.

We’ll see you soon in Jannah. I will work hard on it. 

I promise.


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