The day after we buried him, we went back to the hospital. Our things were still at the Ronald Mcdonald house. We needed to pack up and in a way, we needed our closure.
We were talking to the other family whose son was in the room next to Little H. We shared Monday’s events, it helped us with our grief. And then another parent told me someone was looking for us in the ward. We were still at the pantry drinking milo and talking when one of the nurses and the two admin ladies came in. They found out we were back and they wanted to see us. Hugs and tears. Each time they told us how strong we were throughout Little H’s journey.
Are you proud of us love?
We took long walks, passing by corridors and places we frequented in the two months we stayed. The memories it brought back were bittersweet. We didn’t care if strangers saw us with tears streaming down our faces. It was our moment.
We went to the ward as well. That night when Little H passed on, most of the nurses who had looked after him were on leave. They were shocked when they returned. Seeing us opened up the flood gates. They needed closure too.
Dear nurses, I said this to you and I will say it again:
Thank you. You are an amazing group of ladies. What you did for Little H, I can never thank you enough. You showered him with so much love, so much care. You treated him more than as a patient, you treated him like the little boy that he is; talking to him, singing to him, making him smile, teasing him. On top of all the things you did as part of your job. You gave him so much heart, made him so comfortable that it wasn’t a stranger who was tending to him, but someone warm and familiar.
You were so understanding and patient with us. When we had so many questions and kept asking the same things over and over. You treated us as individuals, as real people with feelings instead of just clients. You reassured us, sometimes updating us even before we ask. Some of you comforted me in those dark times when daddy was away at work, letting me unload my worries, sadness and fear.
When you cried, you showed me how special my little boy was. How he had touched your heart because of his innocence and charm. You showed me that you too are human beneath the uniform. And that made me love you all so much.
You did your duty and you did it perfectly. I can never thank you enough. You cleaned my child when I couldn’t, changed his diapers because I wasn’t allowed to, fed him milk when I couldn’t. At times I was so jealous because you were more of a mother than I was. But that jealousy was shortlived because I saw how much you truly loved and cared for him and it made me happy knowing that Little H still experienced physical touches of love.
Little H brought us all together. I am still missing out on two nurses who looked after him. I hope to be able to see them soon and thank them again.
Thank you son. We are beginning to see and understanding truly just what a special boy you are and how you have brought your daddy and mummy closer to one another and to Allah swt.
I love you son. I love you. I hope you’re happy playing soccer with your friends and the angels in heaven.